Mardi’s story My earliest memories of being different from others would be in my early primary school years. My friendships were very unstable due to my low self-esteem. One day I would have a friend and be very happy, the next day I would come home crying to Mum because I had no friends and [...]
No one would argue that parenting is at times hard work. Many parents are not prepared for the difficult task, and when the child for whom they have such expectations – educational, emotional and physical – develops into a much more complex person, parents have many questions. Acknowledging some of the negative feelings of confusion, [...]
Temperament Temperament is set at birth. It cannot be changed but it can be managed. After a fifteen-year study of temperament in children, the Australian Institute of Family Studies report makes this statement: ‘Temperament plays a very important role in how children develop, especially in the school and emotional areas and it has long term [...]
As children develop, they are presented with a series of challenges in terms of learning and social skills. Some development involves gradual cumulative changes, such as in the development of language. Other development involves more distinct stages, where the child moves from being one kind of person to functioning in a quite different way, such [...]
Discipline is having the courage to set appropriate rules and stay detached when implementing those rules, thus guiding your child towards responsible adulthood. Firstly, let us look at the meaning of the word ‘discipline’. In the minds of many it has become synonymous with punishment. In fact, the word discipline comes from the Latin DISCIPLINA [...]
Developing strategies based on sound developmental principles and an awareness of a child’s individuality, does not mean punishment is totally eliminated. Punishments for harmful behaviour may still be required, even if the behaviour is the result of a child’s difficult temperament; for example, impulsively hitting a younger sibling. The goal is to think ahead and [...]
Consequences are what happen as a result of behaviour. Punishment is an imposed action that helps the child learn appropriate behaviour. Punishment is the giving of an incentive to change behaviour. Hitting a child is ineffective in the long run and has nothing to do with discipline. Emphasis should be placed on developing management strategies [...]
Children need to know what is expected, even though they will not always follow instructions. Making charts to keep track of behaviour can be a positive encouragement. At a time when the difficult child is calm, parents work out details of charts with the child. Keep in mind what is acceptable for you as the [...]
Become Competent – Trust your own Intuition Each difficult child is unique and requires individual attention. The strategies required for one child may be quite different from another. As long as each strategy conforms to the principle of Competence and the rules outlined, such differences do not matter. Raising Difficult Children provides a basic structure [...]
The pressure of living in today’s modern family can, like a pressure cooker, build until an explosion occurs. Previously we looked at some of the feelings parents raising difficult children can experience. Difficult children can incite chaos and ineffective discipline. Often the parents’ relationship is under constant strain and in many cases has already broken [...]
